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8 May 2006
Extender Tips For Newbies
by George Atkinson

When I first set out to strap on a dick stretcher and record my experiences, I gave myself six months. By the end of that time, according to the literature, I'd have a tower of power between my legs the likes of which would frighten as many women as it would thrill. Any longer and I'd have to hoist it over my shoulder to stop it from dragging on the ground. Well, the six months is just about up and my next report will be a detailed accounting of my progress. As a precursor to the Quarterly State of the Penis Report, I thought I'd offer some advice to all the newbies thirsting for some pearls of dick-stretching wisdom.

  1. Firstly, to all prospective stretcher wearers, I recommend reading the advertising claims with a jaundiced eye. Yes, the stats they quote in the ads come from a real study ostensibly offered up for peer review at the 1st International Interdisciplinary Symposium on Genitourinary Reconstructive Surgery. Unfortunately, the supposed peers are busy with their own penile augmentation methods and there's little interest and less money in trying to replicate a study for someone else's product. As far as I can make out, no unbiased studies exist. So whatever the claims made, if you're gunning for a nine inch tool by next Christmas you'd better be starting with something on the plus side of eight inches. It does work but you should scale back your expectations if you're the gullible type.

  2. Most of the extenders I've seen are based on the design developed by Dr. Jorn Erge Siana. They go by various names: Pro-Extender, Jes-Extender, Vimax-Extender to name just a few. The device itself is manufactured in China and is sold for anywhere from $300 to $400 dollars by various online dealers. You may want to consider buying the "lite" version. This comes in a cardboard box instead of the tastefully embossed mahogany box with hinged cover, but who the hell needs that anyway? It's not like it's ever going to be on display. It also comes without the extra 2" extenders that are included in the full version. This may be a concern for guys wanting more than seven inches of beefstick, but for most of us seven inches would be just fine. Bottom line - shop around - it's your money.

  3. Don't go anywhere where you won't be able to take this thing off at least every two hours. I mean it. This thing can go from minor discomfort to screaming pain in less than fifteen minutes. And forget the adage "No Pain - No Gain". The minute you start to feel discomfort, whip the sucker off. After a couple of minutes, you can put it back on and go another hour. But leave it until it's really hurting and you won't want to wear it for the rest of the day.

  4. Keep your eye on the prize. You won't see appreciable gains for months. If you're buying this for your hot date next Friday with Sheri from marketing; forget it, she isn't gonna notice the difference. After six months my wife still can't notice a difference (but I can). That means keep wearing it. Don't get discouraged. Don't get lazy. Remember, the more you wear it, the bigger it gets even if it doesn't seem like it at first. Have patience.

  5. Don't spend a lot of time tightening and untightening the screws when you want to flip it up or down. Just tighten it until its firm, and then pull it up or down as you prefer.

  6. Don't wear the device in the "down" position unless you're prepared for what will happen if it comes loose. You don't want to be chatting up Sheri from marketing and then have to explain the mechanical contrivance that suddenly tumbles out your pant leg. In the up position it shows more, but it tends to stay in place for enough time to get somewhere private.

  7. Don't assume you can wear this thing at night while you're sleeping and wake up every morning a tad bigger. It's a bitch to sleep with.

  8. Don't overwash the silicone tubing. It will loose its rigidity and start to pull out when you increase the tension. You may think you can just get some extra silicone tubing, but it's expensive.

  9. Don't be a hero. If you start to get damage on your dick, ease up.

That's all my advice for now. If you're just starting out good luck and remember: Even a little bit bigger is better than what you're starting with. A mere half-inch separates the bottom 30 percent from the top 30 percent in penis size. Every bit counts.

Catch-up with the other episodes in Paul's Extender Experience.

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